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Updated: Nov 24, 2021

Most relationships are 80/20, but leveling out is a technique.

Eighty – Twenty is what they say

And in most cases, it works well that way

When giving at least 80 percent 100 percent of the time

That other 20 percent isn’t felt, nor does it cause someone to draw the line

And then when you’re only able to give that 20 percent

Someone else picks up the 80 so no one is overspent

However, when the scale is tipped and only one gives the most

That’s when that 20 percent causes the line to be broken over something as small as toast

When you give and give for the sake of ‘Us’

And you’re working your heart and soul to exhaustion without a fuss

Or when you roll up your sleeves and put in late nights for the ‘team’

And you carry your weight, while carrying others to support the ‘dream’

Or when in a partnership for a new venture that’s ‘up and coming’

But you’re the only one sacrificing and doing all the running

Then when you ask for ‘help’ you get sarcasm and attitude

That’s when things shift and there is less and less gratitude

See; while you were pulling your weight and their weight too

All was well, peachy and grand, things were easy to choose

But once you got sick, exhausted, or refused to continue to be used

That’s when it became obvious that you would be the only one to lose

Not getting enough sleep, having headaches, being a sort of dumping ground

Just because you actually do what you say making your word very sound

The problem is not being a team player whether a team of 2 or 22

The problem is not having to carry other’s weight when it’s necessary to do

The problem is the expectation that anything that is needed can come your way

Or because it will get done, your phone or email is the first volunteer they say

The issues arise when you’re overwhelmed, but no one cuts you any slack

No matter how you’ve shared your stressors, no one removes the weight from your back

There is a solution to this burn out syndrome

But it takes acknowledgement, due diligence, and responsibility for each team player to own

Cross training works for more than just the physical sport

Teams who have backups for backups, don’t often abort

Teams who look out for one another don’t typically have high turn over

Teams who work together are blessed beyond a four-leaf clover

Even with the eighty-twenty rule, there are precautionary measures

For no one or handful can carry a team for too long without causing multiple displeasures

This works for teams of 2 and higher

If everyone is onboard, accountable and has a vision with which to aspire

Egos and pride must take a back seat in order for this to be a true win-win

Which means letting go, getting rid of, or even firing all of those who just like to ‘sit and spin’

So how do you adjust during this giving too much season

You seek God for the proper way to cut back without causing blatant treason

Though no matter what, someone is going to falsely accuse

As their half-hearted efforts will now be exposed and let loose

Not intentionally, but that’s just how it seems to go

Now in the blink of an eye, you have gone from team player to foe

You recognize you are not the only one who can
Although you are gifted, God has blessed others with the ability to be the ‘point man’
So, you put your ego and your pride aside
And you recognize that stress can take anyone out, at any age, health, and size

You find ways to teach others to do what you know

It relieves your pressures and stressors and it helps them to grow

This is not the same as pushing your work off onto someone else

This is instead finding balance, creating backups as a win-win for more than self


Two are better than one because they have a good return for their hard work. If either should fall, one can pick up the other. But how miserable are those who fall and don’t have a companion to help them up! ~Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (CEB)

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